Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize