I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
