you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
