apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
