they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
