If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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