Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
