she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
