I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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