I want to have your abortion
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
