So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
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