She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
