fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
