Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
