Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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