i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
