I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
