love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
