White coat. Heels.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
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