There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
