I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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