i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
