new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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