we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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