I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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