No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
