But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
