i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
