Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Your penis caused this!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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