Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
