Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
