Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
