Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
The ass gains better be worth it
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
