YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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