I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize