it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
