This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
