At least make sure they are 18
Why
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
