Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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