I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
