yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize