my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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