i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
