Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I skipped work to stalk him.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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