my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
