basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
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