Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Dignity is for republicans.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Randomize
