I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
