Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
