i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
